Not Because

I am not an artist
Because I am peace

I am not spectacular
Because I am calm

I am not vivid
Because I am serene

Old Dreams

In the dark classrooms of my mind

Light from an old projector

Burns softly on a white window

Creeps gently on the walls

Shines dimly on the floors

Illuminates lessons and corners

Displaying diagrams and crumpled sheets

Shedding light on sleeping students

We all wake

But when?

Soundless Circles

Silence is a never ending circle.
It starts the moment after you make a noise.
First you wonder, Did I speak?
Then you ponder, Should I speak again
Until it changes to, But now it's too late
Right back to, Did I even speak?

And round and round it goes
From sadness to anger to confusion
Right back to sadness
Over back to anger
Until it all melts away back into confusion

Where is the joyful noise
Where is the acknowledgement of my sound
I can speak, and be heard, and make sense
Speak to me
Speak back to me
Break this Silence, this Circle

The Colors of Life

We live
We die
That's the rhythm of time

Light goes on
Light goes off
A binary cycle

Inhalation
Exhalation
The only true dichotomy

But there is more that makes us live
Makes us shine
Makes us breathe

The moment of beginning
The second that ignition happens
The first rush of air

The fading twilight before death
A softly glowing ember disappearing
The pause of emptiness

There is more to life light and air
There is more to death darkness and emptiness
The rhythm of time follows no beat

Give Voice

Give voice
To the empty world around
To the silent places of a room
To the tiny cavity that is an ear

Give voice
To the dead men who are wiser
To the young men who are bolder
To the colleges who are neither

Give voice
To the soil being cleft in two by age old roots
To the air as it is pulled deep into your lungs
To the memory of a long lost kingdom in your dreams

Give voice if only to stem the onslaught of soundless souls

Presence

Christmas lights
Letterman
Parents in pyjamas
Cold feat
Warm tea
Chest on my thighs
Ache in my back
Yoga in my brain
---
Flowers opening and closing
Taking in air and light
Giving it back again

Simile: What is like

Your face is what I hunger for
Like falling leaves in autumn
Like the living rain of spring.

I need your very mind
Like blue in the sky
Like sun on the sand

I hope for your breath
Like the gales of a hurricane
Like the whispers of a secret

Your skin is all that I could ever want
Like the rough comfort of stone
Like the embrace of bedsheets

I fantasize about your dreams
Like the quite love of a park bench
Like the shine of the moon on snow
Like the ripple of grass in the wind
Like the smell of spruce in a downpour
Like the first moment of a morning
Like the timeless days of summer
Like the art you move within me

I want the chance to experience every part of you
Like we never could imagine any other way to be

Verbs: Action Words

Throbbing

Pounding

Aching

Rising

Pulsing

Panting

Moaning

Screaming

Stretching

Sliding

Spilling

Sweating

Bouncing

Knocking

Growing

Touching

Licking

Rubbing

Teasing

Penetrating

Overflowing

Erupting

Exhausting

Intriguing

Exciting

Intoxicating

Moving things.

More than sand beneath the feet

Water rushing between the toes

Brine pricking at the nose

Sun ripening the skin

Wind pulling at the hair

Let my blood be the sea water

Let my flesh become the sand

Let my bones become the sunlight

Let my passion turn to wind

I don't hate this life

But it has no power over me

The living parts of the world

Are far more appealing

Change me into moving things

Welding Haikus

Sweet cherry metal

Flowing freely to my heart

Strange water, Strange bloom

Brighter than dull blood

Illuminating caverns

Of body and soul

Burning new pathways

Forging a heart of iron

Fusing all the parts

Mind Overthrown

My dreams have turned dark and vivid
Sweet bile rising against my throat
Saturation so rich it makes my brain itch
Darker than it should be
Even the light is only a gaudy imitation
There is far too much colour
Not enough life
It strangles and struggles and kills
While panic and loathing follow

Dreams are meant to be bright
Not always good or pure or nice
But they aren't the world
They float above like afterlife
Even nightmares make us feel alive
Fear suspended in a safe place

These are not dreams
These are not dreams
These are not dreams
Something has taken my mind
Using it for some foul purpose
These are not dreams

Love Fades, But Love Lives On

It's 5am and I love you.

In the morning, I will still love you

In 6 months, I'll be trying to forget you.

In 2 years, I'll see something that'll remind me of you

In 30 years, I'll won't even remember your name.

It's not shameful, not cruel, not heartless or sad.

It's life, it never ends, and it doesn't go backwards.

Time rolls on, we forget it all, and live forever in an ever changing present.

Until we die, our lights go out, and we hope our legacy makes a difference.

But right now, it's 5am and I love you.

May it never change. (May it always change)

Built

A body is a castle
Made of towers
Walls
Turrets
Battlements
Keeps
Corridors
Halls
Windows
Stairways
Stone

All these things make a body
A thousand parts for a thousand purposes
All of them coming together
Creating something complex
Not alive
Not beautiful

But functional
A quiet respect for the empty halls
The parapets that stand ready
For a heart that lay an inch away from beating
For a soul that is almost awaking
For the living

A body is a castle
Built for you to inhabit
Take hold of that fortress
Let it be your rock

Build yourself

Apathy

Whenever
When? Never.
Whatever

Oceanic Night

Fluid

Aqua Dreams

Movement Under Water

Paused

Muted Actions

Slow Deliberate Motion

Suspended

Without Air

Wrapped in Liquid

Drowned

Entirely Lifeless

Floating Falling Sinking

A Blended Dichotomy

Everything is fire
Everything is life
Truth is passion
We love what we know
We know what is true

We find fear
We find hate
Evil is us
We abhor what is unknown
We don't know anything

Patiently Forever

I'll wait forever and a day for you

It isn't because you're someone

Fantastic, Wonderful, or Great

I'll wait forever and a half for you

Because I have faith unending

Strong, Selfless, and Steady

I'll wait forever and that again for you

Patience is the virtue I embody

And I think I care about it more than you

Gift of Breathe

When I breathe this shallow city air
It leaves me wanting
Takes away my will to inhale
Fills me with emptiness
Right angles
Man Made Chaos
A facade of steel and happiness

But when I'm lifted
From the cloud of black smog
Though the air be empty
It fills me completely

Crisp cold wind
Pine needles brushed in snow
White glowing horizon
An unbreaking hush
Sun kissing the earth
Sparkling snow
Electric sky
A swift night
and the air

It all takes my breath away
And gives it back to me
The gift of Nature's Majesty

Amid a lot of nothing.

I can't draw
I can't paint
I can't photograph
I can't model
I can't dance
I can't music
I can't sports
I can't organize
I can't swim
I can't bike
I can't debate
I can't self-destruct
I can't excel
I can't experiment
I can't practise

But I can write
That's something

Grains of Thought

My thoughts are grains of sand
That get caught in a raging tide
Pulled up and pushed around
In a something larger than understanding

The problem is
So many are the grains of sand
So vast is the ocean of knowledge
Everything gets lost in the flow

Without them caught or contained
I sit upon the shore of my mind
Marvel at the enormous horizon
Sigh at my own minuscule expression

The Ghost in the Room.

The ghosts that haunt the room

They know our sins better than ourselves

The watch and they wander

They notice the faults and the jabs

Where we fail and live onward

Ever forward bound in our merry life

They take the quiet faults that haunt our steps

Consuming them until it's all cracked

Let them whisper and wander

Speaking a tale of how our lives could be richer

The hushed tones are easy to ignore

Our failed actions are sweeter than perfection

Split

Dark streets

Dark skies

Dark forest

Dark mountains

Bright windows

Bright faces

Bright conversation

Bright laughter

The knife edge between the two

Is easily split

Glimmering pavement

Twinkling stars

Moon light through the trees

Monolithic pride

Artificial glow

Masks contorted into joy

A duel of ill intent

Giggles to hide the contempt

Dark is not dark

Light is not light

Take hold of the knife edge

Split the division

Our Evening

When the sun is glowing in the west

And cotton curtains glow a worn orange

That is when I'll take you close

Time will be our friend

While light is in the sky

Treasure is before our eyes

The cascades of a reflective city

The gently loved truth of a small apartment

What little that we own

Comes together to make a life

The last rays of sun makes us whole

Completes the last part of the picture

The sun will drop out of sight and sigh upon the horizon

Leaving otherworldly greens and blues

But these colours of disquiet that hover in the sky

Cannot pierce our cotton curtains

Candles become our little suns

That illuminate our world

A bed that is too small for two

Because it's made for one

Together when the day is done

Winter

Frozen Sunlight

The Muses of Poetry

The poetry muses
A vulture
A parrot
A robin

The robin sings of blissful things
Of love and little trifles
Dreams of maybe someday sorta
Almost tomorrow hopefully
Far away from here and now
Till tomorrow is gone
And now is all thats left
A head full of happiness

The parrot calls like no other bird
A scream, a cry, a coo
Shifting and changing
From monastic to chaotic
From salvation to damnation
From sultry summer to weathered winter
And back to quiet calm
But who knows what it shall be next?

The vulture croaks last
Like it always does
When it opens its beak
Emptiness pours out

If I could

If I could say one word
And it could reveal
That waist that belongs to only you
I would ask you with all my heart
If I could say it to you

If a sculpter could capture
The side of your body
In perfect accuracy
I would beg him never to
So no man could ever worship a false idol

If the sun could stop shining
To preserve the colour of your hair
I would convince the people of the world
To live forever in darkness
If they could see what I can

But if I could stop the world from turning
Simply for the majesty of your earthly form
It would be an aberration of the truth
A body no matter how perfect is just flesh
A soul is where beauty lives and breaths

A little lonely

I guess I'm just lonely
Not the worst thing in the world
I'm alive, happy, and relatively content

I guess I want to share it.

When We Live

Life is a smile
Half illuminated by moonlight
Amid a troubled night
Full of traffic sounds

Life is the touch
Of travel worn feet
On plush carpet

Life is that sober moment
After a night of inebriation
Just before sleep comes
When it all feels alright

Life is the frost on the trees that glistens
Life is the deep breath after a hectic day
Life is when the lights are on
Life is when you flick them off

Don't need to care

Last one
For the night
While my brain falls apart
And all the lyrics that once were
Are now a pile of weren't

You aren't important
Niether am I

While this seems like a curse
A sentence handed down
Meant to oppress and compress you

Take heart
This is bliss
This is my key to a quiet life

When worlds shift and collapse
They do so without caring
They were bound to shatter anyway

I couldn't save them
Not even if I tried
I am free to care as I want

If it hurts me, so be it
I'm glad i've chosen to care

But if it makes me sick or bothers me so
I can simple say, "I am small"
And happily walk away

Demons have your heart, But...

They are just demons
Speakers of ill truth
Lurkers and liars
The creatures that rob
The beings that deceive

They are just demons
That which shackles you
Tickle your tepid heart
Cause your mind to race
Cause your bones to ache

They are just demons
That blank and black thought
Know that it isn't right
You are happy because you are
You are good because you are

Let no other being foretell the days
The future is sand and you may be the tide

Take hold upon that tepid heart
Squeeze it tight and be the reason it beats

Verse

I was once in verse
Until I became inverse
Now I'm upside down

Shaping

Put enough heat into metal

It will bend

Stretch

Glow

Deform

Flow

Melt

Liquify

Drip

Steam

Hiss

Evaporate

Put enough pressure on a heart

It will warp

Falter

Spasm

Stop

Chill

Rot

Disappear

But remember what heat and pressure are meant for

They shape metal into something greater than before

They cause a heart to grow into royalty

When we are gone

On the days past remembering
Clocks have lost the time
Calendars track years gone past
Dates grow upon the vines
A minute has become minute

The plants have taken it all back

Asphalt turned to soil
Steel turned to trellises
Glass a porthole to sun
Smoke the air they breathe

Unbroken they stand
With only night and day
And the ever growing green
To stand testimony to time

In silence they live
In winter they sleep
In harmony they create
In light they give and take
In equal measure

The superior species has won

Between Earth and Flames

Fire and Passion
Blood and Words
The command is that of war
The conquerers path never ends

Stone and Peace
Bone and Silence
The tidings speak of time
The wise mans road is gentle

Volcanic
Noise
The message is of pride
The leaders way is never simple

For when it doesn't

When it plays
The music seems to melt
Into a cloud that conceals
That wraps and holds you
It's more a part of the heart
Not a earl of the ear

When it plays
The music tears away
Pulling at flesh, bone, and blood
Taking everything real
Making everything dreams

When it plays
The music just plays
More than silence
Less then soul
Words to fill the silence
Paradise undiscovered

We have Grown

And sometimes I remember
That this self destructive time will pass
That the pills we eat, the poison we drink, and the hate we internalize
Will disappear into the photographs
That we hide in locked places
Pretending that they don't exist
Because they happened
We'll never forget or forgive ourselves
But if they stay locked away
Then we can act like we've changed
Like we've grown into who we were supposed to be

It turns out we're all a lie
Images of ourselves built up in our minds

Turns out I'm just a kid
Maybe you are too
But if we like
We could grow up together

We can move out of our parents house
Buy a crappy apartment
Not have enough money at the end of the month
Take a trip someplace average
Go to a fancy restaurant and act serious
Learn to dance together
Take an interest in the garden
Find a hobby
Get annoyed by each others habits
Enjoy early mornings more than late nights
Get together with friends and talk of the old days
Realize that we're covered in wrinkles

Then take out those pictures
That we always locked away
Realize that we have changed
We've grown up

The Love of Hephaestus

In the forge
I toil and turn
This dull and empty piece of earth
Into a shape
Pleasurable to see
Meant for your glittering eyes alone

Across the sea
I row and sail
This small and humble craft of wood
To reach the place
Where you lay
Awaiting my travel worn body only

Upon the bed
I hold and caress
This wondrous and beautiful love of mine
Who by morn
Will be far away
Alone but close at heart

Be the Mountain

Far off
Mountains echo
Caverns wind
Water moves slow
Blood flow of the land
Iron grows
Crystals sing
Darkness is everywhere
Universal and Nonexistent
Deep Below
Depths unknown

Be the mountain
Strength
Unmovable
Untouched by the wild weather
But filled with a quite life
Treasures uncountable
Wonders untold
A thousand passages
Each filled with some beauty
A safe place
A haven from the wicked world

Contradictions

I'm perpetually cold
Yet I'm moving north
How does that make any sense?

I dream of travelling
Yet I still can't drive a car
Yeah, I don't get it either

I abhor menial tasks
But the simple life sounds good
....the fuck?

Little Distractions

I wonder if everything went silent
How many people would lose their minds?
I wonder how fragile we all must be
If the absence of sound can break us.
I wonder about all these noisy thought
Are they keeping me alive?

Sometimes I think treacherous thoughts
Rebellions against my own self
Ways to break crumple and mutilate
I think about them frequently
Or maybe fleetingly
I can never recall

Anything is possible
The words of saints and heros
What they don't realize
Is that half the demons that ever were
Are just the daydreams of people
Who needed something to so

I think I'll sleep for the next hundred years
And wait till I'm a child of ignorance again
So hopefully everything will dazzle me
Make me forget that most things are all the same
Silence will make fools of us all
If only we listen for it

I'm just a silly guy

People think I act ridiculous
Because they think I'm better than them.

Actually

I act ridiculous
Because I know I'm so much less

Why does that make me so happy?

My Culture

I'm a white, fifth generation Canadian.
I don't have a fucking culture.
So I'm sorry that I don't understand the severity of the topic
And I get uncomfortable when it is discussed
But I'm still a step one
You're protecting your people
Your way of life
Your heritage
I'm still finding out what those mean.

Wanna know my heritage?
My way of life?
Thousands of sad lonely people
Hoofing it across a block of ice
To find a patch of earth
That they could stamp their names on
And make a little patch of their old country
Or forget that their old country existed.

See the theme?
The OLD country
The place that came before
One way or another
MY culture
is built around every other one
It's the space between the walls
It's the frame of the photograph
It exists only because something else does.

So my culture is either a bastardization of yours
Or the rejection of it
And all those disgusting shades of non-existance in the middle

And all this rage is aimed at myself
Though it lashes out
I don't hate your culture
I'm not lusting over it either
I long to have what you have
Something to protect
Something that is part of who you are
Something that you are a part of

I don't understand
And I'm sorry

Knowing Love

I love you
Did you know?
I love you
and that is so.

It's not anything
particularly important
But I'll show you how it's wonderful
If you give me a moment

Imagine saying who you are
Putting yourself into words
Admitting that you are unique
Apart from the herds

Now imagine that someone can hear
And understand what you just said
They know you from your little toe
To the tip of your head

Now picture if you can
That they said the same to you
Do you think it would be great
To know them true

That my dear is love
Knowing you inside and out
And knowing both of you
Don't want to be without

Maybe you wont cling to the stars
Or last till the end of time
But for a moment you want each other
And that is sublime

I love you
Now you know
I love you
So?

A Full Stop

Poetry by a poet who doesn't read any poetry

Do you long for eye contact with strangers?

Sometimes, I wish hell would open up

I would like to meet those who have been damned

I think it would change a person for the better

When I do something stupid

Realize that life is a joke and I'm laughing at myself too

If only I could believe half the beautiful words I write

I never finished that sentence

You may ask why, but I think you know I won't answer you

Here's a turn of fate

I'll tell you why

Because if I believed half of the beautiful words I wrote

Then this cosmic comedy demands it be the lonely half

The blackened and hopeless words that drift from an empty heart

And that would be too tragic an end for a silly poet

So I'll never end my sentence

Hope the world takes pity on a sentence fragment

The Nose

Cold and plain are the walls of life
Devoid of hope, passion, or even strife
Just plain white walls and flickering florescence
Ticking clocks while you chisel at rocks.

And all you See oppresses you
Narrow corridors
Bright unforgiving light
Wear and tear on every surface

And all you Hear oppresses you
The hum on ventilation
The grind of electricity
and every single nattering voice

And all you Feel oppresses you
Rough clothing that isn't your own
Shoes made to protect the budget, not your feet
The slight pressure of everyone's expectations

But the Nose knows no bounds
It breaths in deep the smell of freedom
It learns to ignore the brutal assault
It finds the moments of serenity

Cold and plain are the walls of life
But wild are the smells
Let go of hurtful sights and sounds
The Nose knows no bounds

The Problem with Hair

Hair.
What the fuck.
What the actual fuck.
Why...
I can't even....
..... the fuck?
I don't mean to insult you
Or make you feel belittled
But HAIR?!?
Be it long and supple
Short like stubble
Coming out the top of your head
Or peeking out your underwear
Who gives a flying fuck
about such useless stuff as hair?

I could have a grizzly beard
Does that make me weird?
I could cut it from here to there
It's only my goddamn hair!
Tell me if you're a republican or democrat
I don't give a shit if your hair is coloured this or that.
Do you believe in life beyond the grave
Or do you worry about when you have to shave?
I mean, jesus christ, what the hell is wrong
With not getting a wax when you decide to wear a thong?
Hasn't this civilization grown up enough
That we can stop caring about such trivial stuff?

I'll eat my hat
Ever single one I own
If you can give me an answer to that

Until Eventually

Sun

Office

Top floor

Evening

Glow

Cubicle

Desk

Papers

Work

Forgotten

Window

Cityscape

Reflections

Sunspots

Clouds

Reds

Purples

Blues

Next day

It comes a little bit earlier

Until it starts to come a little bit later

Until it starts to come a little bit earlier

Until the eyes that belong to that man

Who belongs to that desk and that office

Turn off forever

Nature changes every day

But never every year

Why teach us that life is uncertain

Just to show us that it isn't?

Everything goes on and on again

Until it stops

But when will that be?

Blood Letting

Reach into me
Where my dreams course
In a crimson sea

Take those living thoughts
From that home of a thumping heart
Take them far from me

Where they spill
Liquid only and not Life
Not the Sickness

Because dreams haunt hearts
And carry with them joy and pain
That circle round my bones

Do what heals the curse
Of too much earthly love
Too much Life

Turn it all off
By turning my skin open
And letting some of it go

Dreams splattered on linen
Pain wrapped in gauze
Joy in red liquid

Calm
The tides gone out
No more dreams

Ye Mighty One

Yea and Verily!
Hold fast ye manhood
And attend this growing yarn!
That weaves a tale like tapestry
And tells of engorged manly bits!

A living monster of man
With woven gold for hair
A body as strong as steel
With teeth made of pearl
and an arse of iron

This great creature
woed entire towns
With a lilting sigh
and would then go on
To make wild passion
With every available orifice

This mind of great
Incomprehensibility
Thought thoughts
that even the gods
dare not think about

And when this lovely specimen
Was destined to die
He looked at Death
Square in the eye
And told him to
"SHOVE OFF"

Ohhh,yes.
Ye Mighty One
Oh master of the flying balls
Oh speaker of the funny word
Ohhhhh, ooooooh,
So much adoration exist
That a noise of exaltation
Is the only thing that'll do

OOOOOOOHHHHHHH
JASON!

Whoops, didn't say anything

I could say nothing at all.

Just remain silent

In an age where noise is everything

I could say nothing

But I choose to make sound

Despite not knowing what sound I want to make

I'll just croak

Gurgle, burp, and honk

and hope it sounds pretty

Really in the end

I still haven't said anything

I suppose I might not ever

But I could say nothing at all

And that would be okay

That would be alright

It's like jazz.

I have a moment
Only a second
To make you feel
Everything beautiful

Somehow
I've got to twist the words
Find the little jewels
Discover the loving message
In enough lines to keep you interested

Why?
Not why give love
Because more love means more love for all
But why struggle
To wrap a blanket of sweet words around you
When I can just ask.

Please
Be beautiful
Create beauty
Inspire beauty
And accept it when it eventually returns to you

Quandary

The wisest man in the world
Can be shot and killed
By the most unwise man in the world

So who is the intelligent one?

The wise man who lets himself be shot
Or the unwise man for shooting.

Clothed in my Quiet Label

I am no romantic
The language of love was taught to me awkwardly

I am no macabre man
The world is far too cute to me

Nor am I a flowery poet
Description is hard and fast to me

However neither am I some realist
Because I dream too often and too loud

My words have no label
No title
No section in your local book store
And while others long
Too stand ass naked before the world
Defying all definition

I would like a bookshelf
With a word in simple lettering
My writing laying there pristine
With the lovers of
Horror
Happiness
Fantasy
Biography
Suspense
Revolution
and Self Discovery
To wander by
And smile
Because they know what to expect

Fake! (And Wonderful)

I want to touch your bum

Even though it means little

Little to nothing

Nothing at all

But I could pretend

I could glorify

Your body

Your mind

Your abilities

Your humour

I could make you my queen

But after a quick game of cat and mouse

You would be you

I would be me

And terribly unsatisfied

But for a second

We could be beautiful

Lost in a lie

That we both made true

...

Ah, the maddening fact!

That love is a lie we agree upon

Two consenting human beings

Going off into a fantasy

Where acceptance is undeniable

Everything is a game

Not just cat and mouse

But dog and car

Moon and Sun

Muse and Artist

Chicken and Egg

Love and Lust

Who says a lie has to hurt?

Who says a dream isn't real?

Will you pretend with me?

We might find out its all a game

One that I'd love to play with you.

(Just give me a reason to play.

Please)

Steam

Soon
Water and Fire will meet
Breathe deep the steam
Live in the mixing passions
Feel how temperate seas
and raging flames
take each others flaws
Make them disappear.

Water
So quiet
Patient
Changed into steam
Living
Moving
So swift and sudden

Fire
Destructive
Eager in the worst way
Soothed
Calm
Restorative
No longer wildly cruel

Soon
Water and Fire will meet
There may be nothing left
After the Fire subsides

Too much wine and Too many idiots.

They make no sense
They scurry and they ask
They wonder and they hide

They do everything a curious little mouse does
But when confronted
They claim to be a fully grown human being

Silly, silly, silly.
They wander about
Like bubbles from a child's toy

They float
They rise
They pop

Idiocy more blatant than post-it on your face
Disguised as cute intentions
But actually just wild and furious desire.

What a bunch of fools

To a girl I've never met

How about we forget our shame?
Our fear and our shields of casual indifference?

We may be a thousand miles away
and never properly been introduced.

But I love the way you are
and you seem to care my way as well

So, if you read this
And I hope that you will

Don't shy away
Let's not pretend

Let's love each other
With nothing more than words

So when we are old
Married, mortgaged, and comfortable

We can still have young love
Words that never age

Tides

Water is my other character
It is my saviour
It is my challenger
It is my nightmare and my dream

As rain, it weeps with me
As oceans, it matches my depth
As mist, it mirrors my mystery
As ice, it shines while frozen solid

Rain doesn't fall where I am
Oceans are out of sight
Mist is an inconstant visitor
Ice is my only companion

And it reminds me just how free I'm not

Water
Come back to me
And never leave

Storm Cloud

Blacken the skies above me

Pelt me with rain or hail

Whip the winds to a frenzy

Cast an unearthly light

Make the falling sky into a symphony

I want you all around me

Storm cloud

That sucks, bro.

If you and I were in the water together
Waist deep
Three feet apart
Would you float downstream
Or reach out to me?

If you and him were in the street together
Green light
With a truck going 70
Would he push you
Or dive out of the way?

If he and I were tied together
Dictators basement
Hitmen coming downstairs
Would I offer my life
Or use him as a sacrifice?

If you, me, and him were in a love triangle
You and I best friends
Him and you madly in love
...
Oh fuck.

This has been a Poem.

I want to make pictures with words.

If that makes any sense.

I want to use my words

To make something worth the time.

And tonight

I'm not using anyone else's words.

Because once in a while

I remember that my words are good enough

That I have something worth saying

So why say anything else?

In a nutshell

I want to say something

I want you to sit up straight

And say, "fuck, he said something"

I want to make you think

Of a time or place that doesn't really exist

I want to make you feel something

Anything more than apathy would be great.

If you read this

and it makes you want anything more

Then chase that anything

And I'm sure the universe

Will let me know I've done good.

Off for the Summer.

I saw Santa Claus

It was the middle of summer

At a sidewalk cafe

He was wearing a dirty undershirt

And red corduroy pants

With a tattoo of reindeer

candy canes and mistletoe

all across his arms

When I asked him his name

He snarked, "St. Nick,

Blow me"

And as he saw my shock

He added

"I don't work over the summer

So buy me some schnitzel

Or keep walking, dumbass"

This experience

So very brief

has coloured my thoughts of christmas

Whenever I get a gift

I don't think of love

Or charity

Or the beauty of humankind.

I think of that aggressive dirty douche bag

and I'm not so sure of anything anymore.

What is Left of A Lions Pride.

Look at me
Tell me I'm not alone
You can do it
Say the words
Thats all they are
Words that can save a sinking ship
But ships sink because of holes
and words make awful building material.

Look at me
Tell me I am good
It's not true or false
Saying them would help
Would mend my broken wings
But bones take time to heal
and even then they don't set right.

Look at me
See me for who I am
Realize that everyday
I fight to be that person
Usually I get ignored
I'll keep making noise and light
But like the sun at high noon
I'm already on my way down.

Not a Gun.

Pull the trigger
Thats all it takes
All it takes to fall down
Down where life is at an end
Ending all hopes of salvation
Salvation that was so real
Real before the trigger got pulled
Pulled into oblivion
Oblivion took you as well

Pull the trigger
And nothing will be the same
Same as it was yesterday
Yesterday when darkness was dead
Dead is all there is left
Left in this deep darkness
Darkness of the soul
Soul wrenching pain
Pain from that trigger
Trigger was pulled
Pulled along into hell

Pull the trigger
Maybe it will help
Help the bad feelings stop
Stop and never return
Return like they always do
Do the last desperate act
Act like you are strong
Strong enough to do whats right
Right way to get out
Out where oblivion is welcoming
Welcoming you to pull
Pull the trigger.

Rest

In the middle of the afternoon
Time slows to almost still
With tired arms and lazy feet
That defy the challenge of walking

So instead of going off
Into a lively afternoon
Bodies sit and people slump
With a feel of almost dozing

But clocks are ticking
And night is falling
Events are starting and Night is blossoming
So persons are decided to wake up

Where life is happening
People are gathering
Drinks are drunk and Laughs are laughed
Where tiredness becomes justified

So sleep can come on righteously
Without that feelings of unaccomplishment
Nothing was ventured and Nothing was gained.
But lies in the evening are easier than naps in the afternoon.

Where Change Will Take Me

Suddenly
Like every time before
The world I was living in changed
Someone left a message
Some little fact changed
A window was opened
And in rushed the winds of change

I've never asked why
I've never asked the universe to explain
I just breath deep the scent
Of wild adventure on the breeze
Jump out my window
Glide into the future

I will fall
I will fly
I will crash
Into the sea
Swim miles in the azure depths
Till land comes into sight
Walk for days from beach
To mountains
To plains
To strange new houses
To familiar old homes
To people I've never known
To people closer than air

I will go
Everything will change
It will be alright.

Night, Light, and Rain.

City lights and summer rain
Among the failing moonlight
Take my hand in the sunset
When florescent daylight is dawning

City lights and summer rain
Washing away what doesn't belong
Leaving nights of bright hope
And pure souls

City lights and summer rain
They link our fingers
Quicksilver chains that shimmer and glisten
Dancing in neon droplets

City lights and summer rain
Fall to the ground
Shine up to the sky
And take me with you.

Spice over Sugar

When cooking with my lives ambition

Or making recipes for love and nutrition

I always pick spice over sugar

Suger is sweet in love

Sweet in life

Makes you feel good

Safe

Warm

It's soft like a childhood dream

And as you take in that Sugar

It'll make you high on life

Make colors brighter

Make the sun warmer

Pain go by faster

Love go by slower

Life go by spectacular

But just as it is sweet

You'll find it's just as sticky

Because after you've had your fill

You'll only want more

And every drip of flowing syrup

Will remind you how you have nothing

How the colors fade

How the sun sets

How pain always comes back

Love always go away

Life always goes dull

And you have a toothache

And a sore stomach

Now Spice isn't any better

It's still just as fleeting

Just as momentary

It comes into your life

and it leaves the same way

But where Sugar says it's alright

Spice says it isn't

It burns on the way down

It bites and nips at your tongue

In a wild duel of heat and flavour

Teaching you that life hurts

That pain is all around

That colors will never be brighter

The sun will never be warmer

Pain is here to stay

Love will run away

Life is as dull as ever

But the little secret that Spice whispers

says

It's never going to be any better than it is now

So now is the time to make the most of it all

So when I'm cooking up thoughts and emotions 

I try and remember all of these wild notions

I always pick Spice over Sugar

Nobody

There was a boy named Nobody
And lets face it
He was a nobody

He walked around
Looked around
Moved around

But nobody knew Nobody
And so to everyone he meet
He was just a nobody

Nobody didn't mind
He didn't even think about it
Because he didn't know anybody

So to him he was somebody
Just being himself
Like all the other somebodies

When somebody laughed
and said that he was a nobody
Nobody just smiled back

Cause that somebody was nobody
And nobody ever bothered
That sweet quiet guy

Nobody

Ever Closer and Further Away

Come softly

Into my bed

Hold me tenderly

Tell me words of love

But when I hold you close

Please mean every single word

Don't lie or cheat to sleep with me

For that would be a shame

And as my arms wrap ever closer

Yours should wrap just as snug

If we aren't like two pieces become one

Then we should be apart forever more

Do you understand my message here?

Be mine or get away

Love me totally or be ashamed

As my arms wrap ever closer

More Words for No Reason.

If I were to write tonight
It would just be words
Not poetry

And if you ask what's the difference
In this moment
I would tell you that I don't know

To those who do not write

Hello

Welcome to the frightening side of the world

Welcome to the place where thoughts are real

Where you can speak and everything can change

Where ideas are dangerous and shaper than knives

Where for once

You are strong

Putrid Virtue

When the moon has set

And darkness is complete

That is when he will walk

From tree to tree

Following her light footsteps

Tracing her light scent

Hearing her light breath

Underneath the stain glass

She goes on her knees reverently

While the candles flicker and fade

A playful tragedy  

Hiding his hungry eyes

Disguising his hungry steps

Masking his hungry self

In a dark corner

Where no one can see or hear

His hands take from her everything

Robbing her soft breath

Stealing her soft light

Thieving her soft life

Back in his warm bed

His eyes flutter shut

She is buried under the chapel steps

And his honour is still clean

Though he took her soft life

Silenced her light steps

Stole her soft light

Stopped her light breath

He did not take her virtue

And he never stained his own

UP

Stay up
Read up
Grow up
Blow up
and finally
Fuck up!

I never want to be famous

Let me write shadows to hide in

Modesty is my only sin

Freedom isn't breaking down walls

It's choosing the ones to build up

To Feel Alive

We dance before the storm
We stand at the gates of hell
We lie on the highway

Why, oh, why?
To feel alive
To feel alive

We flirt with death
From day to day
With every glass we drink

We run into the wilderness
With just enough to live
Not enough to survive

We smile at the thunderstorms
Laughing at the forest fires
Rooting for the blizzards

Is it because we want to die?
We wont accept such a lie
Such an outrageous lie

Why, oh, why?
Do we try and try?
To feel alive
To feel alive

Hiding My Affection

When we meet
I'll keep my compliments quiet
When we touch
I'll keep the contact brief
When we speak
I wont tell all the thoughts

That drift inside my head
That say I find you so amazing
That tell the truth I only dream of
That makes my heart beat circles
Around yours

So I wont say
That I dream of your embrace
I wont hint
That your kiss is all I need
I wont breath
But a whisper of affection

In hopes that you will stay
Not frightened of my love
Not terrified of affection
Just happy to be near me
Content to be in love

And maybe when you hold me
After many starry nights
I'll look to you and bear my heart and soul
You wont even stumble
You'll say you knew it all along
and you love me even more

Going into the Great Beyond

A boy stands in the street
Waiting to be hit by all the rushing cars
Waiting to have all he ever was
Smashed out of his little frame
and spread out for all the see

But every car swerves
Every single person on the road
Doesn't want to take what isn't theirs
Even though he's asking for it
To be taken quite suddenly

To him
The afterlife is so much more exciting
He's seen enough of this world
He knows whats in store
The happiness he could find

To the drivers
This life is all they know
So why go running into the unknown
Stick with what you know
We all end up there eventually

Would you walk into traffic
To see what is in the Great Beyond?
Would you swerve to save a life
Even though someone is ready to go?
Would you be bold enough to drive straight?

Wanderlust

Show me a place
Where the sky matches the sea
In a turquoise harmony
Where the wind and the trees
Make sweeping emerald waves
Where the sun dips into the horizon
To create a scarlet work of art
Where the rain speaks to the ground
In an endless flow of silver sounds

Show me this world
That hides its beauty in plain sight

I'll go looking for it
I promise

Average and LifeLike

The squish of rotten tomatoes

The snap of a pencil

The howling wind

The far off hum of vents in an large room

The scrape of concrete

The slick feeling of oil on skin

The grime of sap from pine trees

The sizzle of the summer sun

The perfect position in bed

The uncomfortable chill of night

The flash from a dying lightbulb

The ice cube melting in your mouth

Nights of Our Lives

Strange nights lie ahead
Can you feel it in your feet?
The urge to run wild
The need to be free

It's creeping on the horizon
As the sun dips out of sight
Frantic madness is on the rise
And it's rising up to you

Will you fight the frightening state?
Lock yourself away
Or will you go on the hunt
For a better stranger world

Half a world away
It lurks inside bottles of gin
Waiting to be uncorked
And set free into your soul

It lies in possibility
A car, a friend, and a midnight
The wind that ruffles your hair
Half smile and a maybe

Strange nights are just ahead
The sun has gone down
Steel your nerves
For the time of your life

One Night

Give me wishes in the morning

I'm only asking for a star

To hang my hopes on

I just need moonlight in the evening

Something to light my way forward

and to keep my company

It's our night

To find who are in each others arms

It's our chance

To be a dream come true

The Most Polite Request for Your Ladyships Lips

Excuse me
Madam
Miss
Darling
Dearest
I regret to inform you of this

That you
Madam
Miss
Darling
Dearest
Have been missed

But you
Madam
Miss
Darling
Dearest
Can change all of this

If you
Madam
Miss
Darling
Dearest
Will give me a kiss

An Awkward Love Poem (I Like Like You)

Please be awkward with me?
I mean
I know
I think
That you and I
Are kinda
Awkward
To begin with

But maybe if you and I are awkward together maybe just maybe we can find a little patch of romance thats completely our own and maybe a little bit cheesy but really isn't that what love is all about feeling so very in love and together and disney movie like because everything can be magical and beautiful if maybe we can trust each other enough to just be.....

Awkward together?

Because
lets face it
I'm crazy about you.

My Version of Nerdfighterlike

I stood upon a hilltop green

With sword and shield

And tunic of emerald shade

She moved through the grass below

With orbs of red and white about her waist

and a mouse that lit the air with sparks

Our eyes met

Fantasies came true

Our adventures became real

She gave me a pokéball

I handed her my ocarina

We both felt great confusion

But I boldly went into the grass

To train my wild companions

And to one day, perhaps, be the very best

And she played with such courage

Till the wind came at her call

And even time itself stopped for her

So we learned of different worlds

Like the sun and moon

But both the place we found our hearts

So I did not mind

Those days when she disappeared

With her pokemon

And she allowed me time

To find the legendary sword

and fight for courage, wisdom, and power

Once in a place moon

We meet on that green hilltop

Between hyrule and professor oaks lab

I lay down my shield

She leaves her pidgy behind

and we take a break from saving the world

Which is Sweeter? (Flattery and Revenge)

My heart is about to wake

With a vicious hunger for hurt

So find an empty grave

and I'll supply the dirt

Because death is a game

That never really ends

And only true gamblers

Play it with their friends

You might say this or that

That your words don't really mean much

But I know broken bones

and those phrases are more than just a touch

Make my lovely heart bleed

I've been waiting since day one

To make you feel just as bad as me

It's all in good fun.

An invitation to be Honest

Break down all fences
Take off those disguises
Stand before the jury
Speak no lies
Be no pretender

Be Truth incarnate
Say what comes to mind
Hold your position
Without hesitation
Just be

If you don't like it
Then don't do it
If you feel happy
Then follow your dream
You are right

Come false priests
Welcome all charlatans
Speak your words
Tell your tales
I'll decide my honesty

I haven't got a clue.

I've walked from hell and back

It made me enjoy walking

I've scarred my skin quite ritually

To prove my reckless ways

I've kissed the empty air

One day it'll change

I've two secrets in my belt

I don't really care

I've got ways to waste my time

Thats all I really need

I've no idea where I am going

But I am going anyway

I have this and that

and its good enough

I have something on the horizon

and it keeps me going

I have a few ghosts in my past

and I keep them at the cemetery

I know

Whatever I want
I know its wanted by someone else
And apples and trees often stick together

So when I feel hurt
I know that it echos
Like a grandfather clock in a grand hall

I know when you are lost
I'll try and lead you home
But that would be the blind leading the blind

Don't dispair, father
I know you hope as I know you hurt
And I know its darkest before the dawn

But I could say anything
It will ring hollow
I know that hopeless place you've woken to.

Immemorial

Awaiting.

In forest light by evening light.

In silence.

Unyielding

To the ravages of time

Immortal

True

By virtue of age

Undeniable

Still

As an age comes and goes

It stands

Gone

In mind and meaning

Forgotten

Stand forever

Fall from thoughts

Await revival

Secluded truths

A man could say
The secrets of the universe
It doesn't matter if
No one is listening

The sun could set
For the final time
It would be strange
But we would adjust

You could do your best
Or your worst
To, with, or on
Anything at all

I could say
Something important
If I took a moment
To write something

The Rallying Cry

Hear me, oh world, oh world

My cry is as dawn to the night

As striking and breathtaking

As the Lords own heavenly light

Fear me, oh men, oh women

I shall part thee like the air ahead

Moving with such determined haste

That will make the stout crumble

Tremble, oh earth, oh earth

For while I have legs that walk

No corner of thine self is safe

From my peerless curiosity

Rejoice, oh companions, oh friends

I have found the heart of courage

and though the fearless are fearful

I shall be lion, prince, and jester for you   

[Myself]

See?
That
That right there is my problem.

I want to open up and effect the people around me.
I do
Really.

I want to say something
Anything!
and for someone to hear and reflect

And I'm so tired of opening up
I'm so dead inside from giving
I've given everything but my heart

Is that what you want
Is that where my fault lies
No heart?

Because if so
What cruel bastards you are
For demanding so much of someone

Just to effect someone
Just to touch them for moment
They need my one and only beating heart

Why am I saying they?
It isn't they
It's you.

Reading this right now
You need to feel my heart
If there is any chance of you believing this

And I just can't give it to you
I don't know why
But I haven't figured out the means to.

So please
Have mercy on me
Because this isn't just a game

This is my life
I've said it in so many different ways
These words are me

Tell me you hear them
Say you reject them
Take my heart and I'll know I've done something important with it.

Have I done what I set out to do?
Have I effected you somehow?
Will I ever know?

Lost in the Fog

Where do we go?

Ahead is beyond our sight
And so is our way home

Where do we go?

When every path is blind
Kiss lady luck goodbye
And step into tomorrow

In a sea of lunacy
This is our lunar lullaby

Artistic Anchor

What we do as poets
Is find the rock that anchors our soul
Love
Hate
Hunger
Art
Apathy
Excitement
Bemusement

We take that simple
Yet concrete part of ourselves
And describe every angle of it
Every
Painstaking
Angle
Point of View
Side
Part
Piece

Until one day
We write the core of it
And it dies within us
Gone
Disappeared
Fled
Moved on
Has Become
Alive
On Paper

Then we wander aimless
Our anchor uprooted
Until we find
Another
And spend another lifetime

A Lost Piece of Me

A piece of me is missing

and it is never coming back

It's small and unimportant

But that is beside the point

We are created whole

With every part in unison

I have a lost a small part of me

What does that make me?

It was severed with a knife

It shrivelled and turned to dust

Where has it gone?

Where is that piece of me?

Has it connected to the universe?

As all energy does?

Has it founds its wandering way

To the heavens far above?

Though within a day or two

It will surely grow back

It wont be that piece of me

Not in all actuality

What is it that takes its place

What fraudulent piece of self?

It isn't I that exists there

But some extension of something else.

Perhaps this is what it means

To truly be alive

Shedding pieces of ourselves

Replacing them from inside

Becoming something not seen before

A patchwork of this and that

Scar tissue melding with scabs

Pink skin beside fresh wounds

Can I change the World?

All I want to do is change the world.

Not in any meaningful way
Not to any sort of paradise
Not to a place without pain
Not into anything else

I just want to prove it can be changed.

So men and women far greater than I
Can do things far greater than I
and Change the world in meaningful ways
and Do the things I'll never manage

Maybe the history books will keep
A little space for me at the bottom of the page
A footnote in the introduction
An honorable mention in the hall of fame

That says
This man proved it was possible
This man took the first step
He planted the seed

Now see what these OTHER guys did!

Pain is all we have.

Pain means your alive.
Keep breathing
though it hurts

Pain means your doing it wrong
Don't stop
Pain means your alive

Pain means its real
This isn't a game
This matters

Pain means you have fought
It'll still be there tomorrow
So keep up the fight

Pain means your alive
Even if you don't want to be

Pain is the question
You provide the answer

Like Father, Like Son.

Will you remember me as I leave for the woods?
Can you hold me in your head?
Is this old worn out self worth keeping
Tucked away safe in your memories?

When I light my life aflame
Will you respect that fire?
Will your arctic opinion douse my blaze
and leave me with only ashes?

Will my legacy be a thing of pride?
I don't need wealth or fame
I don't need the masses approval
I only want you to say yes.

Because my winding trail will take me far
And I will tread where you never wanted me to
But it is my journey and my destination
Please don't make me ashamed

Two lives that are alike in dignity
I learned my faults from you
Just as you taught me
All my strengths

I

I Love

Does that make me good?

I Hate

Does it make me wrong?

I Am

Does that make me important?

With Rain, Comes Fog

When the rain falls into your life

The fog holds you close

It doesn't ask for things to get better

It doesn't ask why the rain is falling

It just holds you close

A little removed

A little remote

But all around you

The fog can't give you a warm embrace

It can't do much more than be there

But it takes away the world

Lets you be alone for a little while

While the rain rolls into your life

While the day turns grey

The fog lets you forget

It gives without giving anything

Earth's Embrace.

I stopped holding gravity

and it said goodbye to me.

I kissed air a final fair well

and it left my lungs.

I spent one last evening on earth

and we shared a bottle of wine.

Then the sun waved to me

and I soared towards it.

The stars giggled at me

and I smiled right back.

The moon sighed at my freedom

and I shrugged an apology.

The universe nodded its approval

and I thanked it quite earnestly.

But winter reminded me of snow

and I stopped flying so fast

And spring reminded me of rain

and I slowed even more

And music reminded me of happiness

and I held still

And paper reminded me of art

and I drifted ever so slowly backwards

And clothes reminded me of comfort

and I started falling

And people reminded me of life

and I plummeted

And before I knew it

I was laying on grass

What a way to fly from the earth

What a way to fall into its embrace

Paying Attention

He said the most hurtful things

By not saying anything at all

I asked him for a little part of himself

That he begged for the world to see

But he wouldn't give it to me

Do you want the attention I'm giving?

Is it your fault or mine?

She said the kindest things

By being totally honest

She doesn't know I exist

And she'll probably never take the time

Sorry

Better luck next time

Do you want the attention I'm giving?

Is it my fault or yours?

I say what comes to my mind

Sometimes horrifying

Sometimes comforting

But I give myself freely

Take what you want or nothing at all

Do you want the attention I'm giving?

Is it our fault or happenstance?

Not so much

Do you need me?

Because I really hope you don't.

I really hope that I am not the only thing

That gets you out of bed.

If I'm the only person who

Can make your heart beat.

Then I am responsible for love and life

I'm responsible for you.

So don't love me with all your heart

Don't give yourself completely up

I want to love you for who you are

Not because you can't live without

The Question of Death.

What is death?

We know the heart stops

The breath stops

The muscles relax

The brain turns off

The tissue decays

The growth ends

Every part that was once ourselves turns to nothing

That is the aftermath of death.

But what is death itself?

That moment when everything finishes

When whatever it is that makes us alive

Flickers and shuts off

Does it disappear?

Like rain into the ground

Does it leave our sight?

Like the setting sun

Does it change its form?

Like a caterpillar and a chrysalis

Does it turn off?

Like a little machine

Does it live on?

Like a legend

In effect I ask

What is life?

And what is its relationship with death?

A Summer Recollection

Have I mentioned how I long for woodsmoke

To saturate my very being?

How I long for blackened soles

burnt skin and bruised elbows?

Have I spoken about skies that never darken

Nights that are too short and too memorable

Fearlessness in the face of sunny weather

Or fleeting freedom that bleeds into every action?

I don't know if I've said how much I love the sea

If I've used my words to sweetly caress and adore

The joys of friend, wine, music, and campfires

The things that live in the brief heat.

I cannot remember when summer was here

I don't recall a life without snow

Green grass is a mystery to me

A story that I used to know

But when I smell drifting woodsmoke

Or catch a glimpse of a bare foot

For a second I breath in summer

and for a second I remember

Awoken

Today

I woke up

From a dream

That I had been in

For most of my life

That dream

I was following and imagining

Was that I was an artist

That I was going to change the world

With words and songs and pictures and paintings

And when I awoke

It wasn't like a seven a.m. wake up call

Where all the pieces of life can't come together

But rather like a sunday summer morn

When you can't think of anything better

Than being awake and alive in this moment

I'm awake

And I don't need

To sleep away my time

My dreams are my past

And my future is about to begin

Thats why I want a dreamer

Thats why I want a believer

So I can make their dreams come true

So I can give a base to some else's hopes

This I can do

This is enough for me

This is more than a dream

This can be my life

Can you see this Reality?

As real as autumn leaves

As real as fallen trees

Climate change

As real as emotion

As real as commotion

Panic

As real as morning alarms

As real as the registry on firearms

Government

As real as screaming fans

As real as wedding bands

Celebrations

As real as late nights out

As real as a girl who chooses to pout

Interactions

I want this to be as real to you

As it is to me.

See?

And for a second, He becomes everything he ever dreamed of being.

He walked into the crowd

Like blue food colouring drops in a glass of clear water

Moving like piece of velvet caught in the wind

He was dressed in the finest silks

Ember threads danced with indigo fabric

Rippling on his flawless skin

He inhaled the crowds expectations

And breathed a sweet word softly against the air

With all the force of a heartbroken child

And every heart melted

Like thick chocolate on a summer sidewalk

A natural high brought on by love

He moved into the crowd

And tripped on the first step

Falling ass over teakettle

And the spell was broken

And the crowd laughed

And time started again

No feelings of twisting velvet

No magic and mimicry

No melted chocolate

Another day

Another dollar

And a man in overly flamboyant clothing.

"Whoa, doesn't that guy look weird?"

"I dunno. I think it looks good"

I had a weird dream, but it was kinda awesome.

I had a dream that you and I went on a date

But I forgot the way

I asked for your plate

From the french waiter who dropped

Our shared piece of cheese cake

I remember it started with a stutter

And ended with a kiss

You were like melted butter

But I was more like margarine

Underneath the willow trees

I'm pretty sure you asked for roses

With the thorns all taken out

But I think I got a few lengths of hoses

And just covered them all up

Moses supposes

I only wish that I could see you in person

The way you were in that dream

Because the sun on the lake

And you standing there without a mistake

Was too beautiful to remember

I just have to see it again

So maybe I'll go to bed

Alone in a bed two acres too big

And maybe if I'm lucky

I'll dream the dream of how I asked you out

That started with a stutter and ended with a kiss

and took us across the world

Back to my bed

Now with an occupancy of two

The Voice In My Head.

There is a voice in my head

It tell me all the awful things I can do

and I listen to it all day long

Half smile on my face

There is a voice in my head

That talks about all my fears

and I ignore it all day long

With a grimace

There is a voice in my head

It doesn't say a thing to me

But I listen all the same

I'll wait for it

There is a voice in my head

And it reminds me of everything to do

I listen to it on occasion

While I roll my eyes

There is a voice in my head

It says things are going great

I listen carefully for that one

It makes my smile carefree

There is voice in my head

And it says all these things

That voice is me

Or is it someone else?

Sometimes I forget.

Life and Trees.

Life can be like a tree

A thousand little branches and needles and bark

Incapable of being captured in fine detail

Like life

Beautiful in its simplicity

Like life

Both fragile by fire and stoutly strong

Like life

Life like

Live life like a tree

Weather the storm

Sleep in the winter time

Grow towards the light

Blossom

Flower

Age

and die.

Unconventional Means

I eat junk food to plug my veins

I drink energy drinks to fry my nerves

I lay around all day to make my muscles rot

I watch TV to drain my brain

I stay inside to lose the color from my skin

I say stupid things to aggravate those around me

I stay up late to make my body weary

I work from dawn till dusk to break my soul

I sit at home alone to disappear from civilization

I sleep till noon to ignore the rest of the day

I kill myself with unconventional means

My body is a temple

I'm an atheist

OutSide

This world is not as it seems

This life is actually much larger

Everything around us is a room

In a giant manor

We keep the doors shut

Bar them with wardrobes

Cover the windows with blankets

Sit in a corner with the lights turned off

Because what lies OutSide

Is too much

Too Much

TOO MUCH

It defies imagination

Thos things consume understanding

Devour common sense

Relish in their world and shun our little hideaway

So we stay tucked away

Living life in a dark room

Unwilling to open our eyes

And happy with the lights off

Because we know

As awful as tomorrow may be

Or as terrible as our actions could be

They could never be quite as horrific and incomprehensible

As what lies on the OutSide

Projected Self Image

Does it matter

How you dress

What you say

Where you look

Who you are with

Does it matter

How your body appears

If you want to stay out late

If you don't like someone

Does it matter

How you spend your time

What makes you laugh

What turns you on

It doesn't

It doesn't and it makes me sad

That kids are willing to die

For things that have no bearing

On who they are or what dreams they have

Can we drop the pretence

and just admit to the world?

Can you stop the pretending

and embrace yourself at last?

Can I end this hiding

and just move on with my life?

Duel Drivel

From the sky

To the earth

Falling

At the bottom of the hill

Rushing to the top

Climbing

Face on the headstone

Hammer swinging down

Dying

Flowers at graduation

A road trip to anywhere

Living

A couple in love

Together in the unending

Commitment

A couple of fools

With others in their heart

Abandonment

How Quiet

The snow that fell is turning to ice

The sky has gone from blue to grey

The trees look more like death than life

And all the sounds of summer

Have gone silent

Birds flee to the iron grey sky

Laughing children now respect the hush

The wind no longer rustles the grass

There is none left

To disturb the winter day

Phones lay unchecked

Mail routes have been snowed in

Even conversation dwindles to mere necessity

The cold claims more sounds

The ones of human connection

All across the chilled hearts

A respect for the season of silence

No one dare faces it

All words and well wishes

Wait till spring

Plea

I abdicate control

Because I want to give it to you

Okay?

Take me

Because I want you to have me

Please?

Don't fight with me

Because I want you to be free

Understand?

I give myself up

Because I want you to feel as I have

Alright?

Shut up

Just shut up

I don't mean to hurt you with my words

Or make you feel like you cannot speak

But instead of being kind

I thought I'd be direct

Shut up

Don't speak when you don't know what you say

Don't express an idea that is more complex than you can dream

Don't try and seem important by association to a cause

Don't pretend

Don't assume

Just shut up

Listen

See

Witness

Experience

Know

You don't need to be the axle

Sometimes you're just the wheel

You don't have to be the catalyst

But just ride the wave of change

You don't need to be more than you are

You will learn soon enough

Shut up

These words hurt like a tonic

A sharp cure to a dull disease

Ignorance

Prairie Spirit

I'm an Alberta boy

Through and Through

True Blue

Prairie Child

Born to be wild

Upon the foothills

I've taken to roam

My Canadian home

With winter chills

and summer thrills

My heart beats for more

Than the earth I tread

It beats for the people, living and dead

It's about the spirit of the west

Long forgotten by the rest

I would leave the fields of wheat

See what other places hold

If they're all I've been told

But the mournful winds speak of pride

From which no country boy can hide

It tells us that we can't leave

No matter how many miles we go

We will always know

Just as this land was pioneered

We were also domineered

I'm an Alberta boy

This place is my place

It's a part of me

For better or for worse

We're together for life

If I was Yours

If I held you till your dying day

Would that make me noble?

If I stayed and weathered every storm

Would I be worthy in your eyes?

If I was a shield against the evils of this world

Would you think me your soul mate?

If I did all these things for you

Would that change a thing?

Made from My Own Tears

I am nothing if not a puddle of my own tears

Freeze dried, built up, and modelled after me

A walking imitation of the saddest moments

In my short and weary life

Damn, I love being pure concentrated sadness

Makes me a carefree, footloose, and without a fuck to give

Isn't that the description of the wild teenage youth

Without the weeping sorrowful self indulgence

Because all my tears have been removed

And put to better use as kidneys and spleens

No need to weep tears that don't matter

They are a part of who I am

Unlike the fucks I have given away

Book Lover

A whole life

A whole love

Was lived in one day

Was loved in one sitting

And afterwards when they were laid to rest

I stood up

Stretched my legs

And went on with my day

But I'm a glass of water

Being used for art

These little words leave their mark

and color me a little more

The Weatherman On Vacation

The weatherman conducts the clouds and the seas

While he stands on the beach in the tropical breeze

"Play on, dear weather, play on, my oldest of friends"

The clouds and the seas along with that tropical breeze

Sing with a warm and lively Mediterranean ease

"Oh where, Oh where, shall we play, oh weatherman?"

The weatherman told them it was all a matter of ease

To go from sunny Mumbai all the way to Belize

"Go on, dear weather, go on, my friendliest of mates"

The breeze and the sun went from Mumbai to Belize

and danced from port to port and from tree to tree

"Oh thank you, Oh thank you, weatherman, for making us free"

The weatherman sat in the shade of the sunny palm trees

Sipping cold ice tea with a grin that was as cool as can be

"Oh how relaxing is the study of meteorology"

A World of Hurt

All is hurt and pain

We accept this early on

And from this cradle

We crawl into the wide world

Knowing that it will sting

But we learn to walk

Despite being battered and bruised

We learn to talk

Against the odds that were stacked

We find happiness

If pain paints your canvas white

Your beauty is clear as crystal

It is only the hopeful who fall

They who have a black canvas

Their story is never quite so pristine

They see this world without its wounds

So they find its agony in every corner

Those poor souls who want

But can't see the truth of hope

That you must lose it to love it

This is the message written straight

Know that life will hurt

Life will break you in more ways

More ways than you could ever dream

But those broken bones will be the key

The key to your bleeding hearts recovery

Y!

Take my body lovingly

So I may leave you gently

Float to the heavenly

And onward to galaxy

Where no one will be

And no one will see

All the potentiality

That will come from me

And glide blissfully

Around the ghostly

The friendly

The gentry

And out favourite man named Jeffery

Now until Tomorrow

There was light long ago

Until it went out

There was a fight long ago

But it went south

There was a night long ago

and even that died

There was ice once upon a time

It wasn't cold

There was mice once upon a time

That were bold

There was spice once upon a time

and it was never sold

But Now

Our prize is a fire in this time

That burns and bites

Our prize is an ire in this time

That consecrates and rights

Our prize is a liar in this time

That takes himself to new heights

Now is darkness till tomorrow

Leaving us without eyes

Now is dreamless till tomorrow

No promise prize

Now is heartless till tomorrow

Lacking breath even for our sighs

A Broken Thing

I'm a broken clock

A busted chair

An inoperable lock

An out of order escalator

Though I can be fixed

I seldom will see the wrench

They would rather have me nixed

Put into the trench

And want to know my reply?

Silence

How do I say goodbye?

Acceptance

Call me broken

Call me trash

Others will and have spoken

Of treasure, garbage, and cash

I am a dead ceiling fan

But when I'm put on display

People never ask me if I once ran

They asked me how I came to be this way

Oh, and the tales I then tell

Of the many years that passed

Of good times and of living hell

The roles in which I've been cast

No longer am I a broken thing

Now a living piece of histories

An object that exists to sing

Past and Present, War and Foreign Seas

Another Self

I am possessed

Consumed by a being that isn't me

This being calls me in my mind

And begs to be followed and captured

It asks nothing that I would not give

It asks to be copied utterly

I do not deny this little thing

In fact I chase it with all my heart

I want to be that shadowy someone

That is the me just out of reach

But in reaching for this phantom dream

This creature of passion and mystery

I leave behind that which I already am

In favour of what I think I should be

I am starved half mad

By this conflicted point of view

And the sickly sweet food that will end my hunger

Is ignorance from this dream, this being, this self

The Words- A Beat Poem

My words are raw

shallow

hallow

But I can't even lay claim to that

Because my words have yet to find

That depth of despair

The key to nowhere

That little voice inside

That says

It's hopeless

No, see, my words are still young

Still green like the growing trees

Not old enough to bear fruit

Or bear the challenge of a winter

that consumes the weaker half

And leaves the elders and the committed

Still standing

But maybe

Just maybe

If I stand inside the storm

Of frozen ice and fallacy

Then maybe one day I will see

That the storm has not consumed me

But let me be

To grow another day

To find the means to say

Whatever it is I'm going to say

Whatever sweet poison is to drip from my lip

Whatever hopeless melody my tongue will trip

Whatever piece of soul will come to you in the airwaves

Whatever meaning can be found among the shockwaves

Whatever words that I speak

Whatever part of me that leaks

I plan to be able to say them right

With conviction and might

So the whole world can stand up and cheer

Or tell me to fuck off and disappear

I don't care either way

I have something I need to say

And if someday I can make those words flow

That'll be the day that they go.

Raise a Glass and Drown Yourself

A red tonic to sooth the soul

A blue one to lift the spirits

A green bottle to calm the nerves

An orange drink to calm the mind

Drink it down

To your gut

Liquid luxury

To free you from your rut

Mix the colors

Red and blue

Pour them down

A dangerous slew

They'll cure your troubles

Take away the pain

Rob you of your senses

Leave you completely insane

But think of the joy

What a terrible high

You aren't even sure

If it'll be the night you die

So pick your poison

And cast your dice

Will that be on the rocks

Or would rather no ice?

Heart and Home

The fire in my belly

Proves I'm nothing more

Than a dying teenage heart

Waiting for some shred of truth

To bring the house down

Upon my crying head

But in the wake

Of a broken home

At least then I could say

There was once a day

That was better

That wasn't quite so benign

So I'll build this place

Back to its former glory

This time I'll take a second

To feel the back-breaking labor

To know what is being made

So it wont be made in vain

This is my house

This is my home

Where my sadness doesn't live

Where anger is a joyful noise

Sounded and then forgot

This this place that is my heart

A Rhyming Couplet.

Hold me tender

Hold me still

While we sit

In the window sill

Touch me soft

Touch me light

As we wait

For it to be right

See me quiet

See me sleep

Know that I

Only pretend to be deep

Love me wild

Love me silent

With you

I'll always be content

Would you like to be a rhyming couplet with me?

Our Beautiful Self Abuse

This is beautiful self abuse

The need to make something

That doesn't need to be

The desire to paint the world

But without a single brush

That part inside that screams

"Make this a reality"

While deep down

You know its all a dream

That you wont ever awaken from

A memory that never happened

A trick of the mind

And a pull on the heartstrings

Join me in the weeping cry

Of lost souls who shed tears

By the light of the forlorn stars

But stand like mountains of confidence

In the blazing daylight

Fear them who know the sun

Forgive them who love the moon

Fight them who tell you to follow your dream

But mock your every step

In this beautiful self abuse

That is our unfathomable existence.

Maria: Almost Alive

Everything is backwards

And everything is wrong

Maria

You've taken my life and all I have known

And changed it into something odd

Maria

I saw you fall and I saw you die

Yet I spend most of my waking hours with you

Maria

As I walk the river side

You always stay by my side

Maria

When I'm eating at a table for one

You sit there and stare enviously

Maria

As I undress for a solitary shower

You smirk and giggle and unfeelingly caress

Maria

Even when I lay my head to rest

You lay beside me and ask for something I cannot give

Maria

You jumped into the river

You left behind this life

Maria

I cannot bring you back

I cannot give your ghostly life meaning

Maria

But speak as I do

And the list all the reasons

Maria

You just stare back at me

And be that indecipherable

Maria

Everything is backwards

You are not here

Maria

But every waking moment I have

Is spent with you

Maria